i

i've been thinking a little.
no. actually i've been thinking a lot lately. about life.
it's rather interesting how much people, even strangers, inspire me daily.
everyday i check up on blogs of people i don't even know. people who live far away or not too far away. who have different lifestyles and beliefs.
everyday i see people i know, i talk to them, they lift me up. even if it's just a little.
all these people are inspiring in their own way. but they all have something in common. WE all have something in common. we are all trying to be happy, we are all trying to be us. 
and just by getting that daily dose of inspiration from these people, i find out more about myself each day. things that i didn't know i was capable of. things that make me happy. things that affect me emotionally. things that make me excited for my future.
today i made an equation.

andrew+carissa's love, film, and happiness for life and each other.

+

rockstardiaries lifestyle, beliefs and fun ideas.

+

thelittleredhouse's love of family and excitement for life.

+

abeautifulmess's creativity.

+

nienie's courage and love of family and the gospel.

+

bleubird's fashion, colormekatie's humor, todayisaw's daily drawing project, acupofjoy's style and thesnailandthecyclops's simplified home.
+
carrie.

+

my friends.

my family.

+

the gospel.

= my daily dose.

my daily dose of inspiration.

finding the beauty in simple things.

finding my style.

finding what makes me happy. and who will make me happy.

and reasuring me that that happiness doesn't come from anything that will degrade my mind or my body.

reading about these people's lives everyday is a reminder to me that i can have that. i can have a cute family in a little house that i can decorate. that i can have a husband who cares about me with all his heart, and kiddos that i can teach and love. and don't forget that they can be mine for eternity.

it's weird how much i have changed in the last year-ish. last year at this time, something as ordinary as an old key wouldn't have made me as happy as it does now.

for me, happiness is a video of a couple in love. old things, film cameras or heart doilies and record players. making a blanket fort and sitting in it. seeing pictures of a family who went on a fun vacation. a good scripture or talk. watching my dad wrestle with the dog at the foot of my bed, and my sister's smile when she brings her geography grade up to an A. a good movie. a person with faith. knowing that my mom knows where i am, and that she cares. a red umbrella. a red balloon. friends who care, friends who lift me up. planning out my future home and dreaming of that guy i'll call husband. buying a new CD and hanging the cover on my wall.

so many things! i have so many things to be grateful for, so many things that bring me happiness.

and i am so glad i've found who i am.

that i've found my style.

what to expect. 

what makes me happy.

what makes me, me.

and that carrie has been with me the whole time.

because honestly, what would i be without her.
i decided that my husband will probably be something like having an upgraded carrie. because if he's cut out to be all he is in my head...well, it's just hard to beat a friend like carrie.
someone knew i wouldn't survive without her.

******************************************************************

whoa, so many words. but lately i just feel like my mind is running a marathon. or two. i think so much. i think in my sleep.

so i wrote.